September works in the head like a second New Year. Alicia Vázquez, psychologist coordinator of Respira Project, explains the mechanism: «September represents a very marked cycle change, so many people experience it as a second New Year. After the holidays, returning to the routine leads us to take stock and to consider what we want to maintain, change, or incorporate into our life». Psychology calls it the new beginning effect, and describes how certain temporal milestones increase motivation to start changes.
That impulse, however, usually lasts only a short time. «The problem is not usually the lack of willpower, but how we plan our objectives. We cannot rely solely on immediate reward: we need to connect what we do with a purpose and with something that really has value for us», explains Vázquez. When goals are too ambitious, maintaining the effort for months becomes nearly impossible.
There is a key difference between the two concepts. «Thehábito is mainly a conduct we repeat until it becomes more automatic, whereas the ritual also incorporates personal meaning: it has our form, our moment and our way of doing it», notes Vázquez. That is why the ritual is experienced as something chosen, while the habit can end up feeling like an obligation.
Turning a goal into a ritual helps sustain it over time. «The key would be to move from ‘I have to do it’ to ‘this is my moment to do it.’ When a conduct stops feeling solely as an obligation and begins to form part of our identity and our way of caring for ourselves, it can become easier to maintain it», explains Vázquez.
The myth of 21 days has no real backing. «Lally and colleagues’ research found that the time needed for a conduct to reach a stable level of automaticity could vary enormously, between 18 and 254 days, with a median of 66 days», details Vázquez. There is no universal deadline; it depends on the conduct, the person, and the regularity with which it is repeated.
How to negotiate with your own brain
The first step must be small, because the brain tends to avoid what it perceives as demanding. «Instead of ‘I’m going to train for an hour,’ think ‘I’ll put on my shoes and do 10 minutes,’» recommends Vázquez. Associating effort with something pleasant also helps: «Our brain responds especially well to immediate rewards and tends to avoid discomfort. Therefore, associating effort with something pleasant can make it easier to repeat the behavior».
Having a concrete plan reduces the discomfort of starting. «Tuesdays and Thursdays, after work, I walk 30 minutes,» exemplifies Vázquez. The clearer the when and how, the less mental effort the decision demands, and that is precisely what makes the behavior repeat without needing willpower each time.
Around 80% of goals are abandoned before February, though the figure should be taken with caution. «If we set goals that are too distant or demanding, we do not have a concrete plan, we do not find a reward or a sense in the process itself and we make the brain perceive the conduct as a constant effort, it will be much harder to maintain it», warns Vázquez. Abandoning a goal does not mean a lack of discipline: it usually means that the objective was not sustainable.
«It is not only about achieving a goal, but about finding meaning in what we do. When we connect a conduct with something that really matters to us—feeling better, taking care of ourselves, having more energy, enjoying our time—the effort stops being the only protagonist», summarizes Vázquez. That is, she explains, the point at which a ritual begins to sustain itself, even when September’s motivation has faded.
